Close to Homer

Transcript

JONATHAN COULTON, BYLINE: From NPR and WNYC, live from The Pageant in St. Louis, it's NPR's hour of puzzles, word games and trivia, ASK ME ANOTHER. Here's your host, Ophira Eisenberg.

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OPHIRA EISENBERG, HOST:

Thank you, Jonathan. It's so great to be here in St. Louis. It's such a nice change from New York. People smile at you; they talk to you in stores. The checkout clerk at Whole Foods said to me, so did you try anything new today? It totally caught me off guard. I was like, yes, I tried not to criticize my husband's driving. That's not what she meant. Our VIP has written several novels including "Prep" and "Sisterland," which is set right here in St. Louis. We are very happy to have author Curtis Sittenfeld.

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EISENBERG: And it's time to get to the games. Our first game is called Close to Homer, and here to play it are Charles Pavlack and Max Leinwand.

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EISENBERG: Charles, you ran a dog rescue out of your house?

CHARLES PAVLACK: Well, my wife did. And it was just easier - it was cheaper to stay.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: For you?

PAVLACK: For me, yes.

EISENBERG: OK, how many dogs did you have?

PAVLACK: The most we ever had was about 30 at once.

EISENBERG: What?

PAVLACK: Yeah, that's how I felt too.

EISENBERG: Yeah, and Max, you're a producer at Fox Sports and you do sports coverage for a local radio program.

MAX LEINWAND: I've done an old-timey radio character on some local radio programs.

EISENBERG: OK, and what's this old-timey character called?

LEINWAND: Scoop McGillicutty.

EISENBERG: All right, now how would Scoop McGillicutty introduce himself?

LEINWAND: Well, good morrow my boon companions. I'm about to take this radio program a huckleberry above a persimmon.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: Oh, my god. Have both of you watched "The Simpsons"?

LEINWAND: Yeah.

PAVLACK: Yes.

EISENBERG: Both of you. And is there a character you would say you closely relate to, Max?

LEINWAND: Probably Krusty the Clown.

EISENBERG: Yeah? 'Cause of the old-timey thing?

LEINWAND: Because I'm ashamed of my Judaism, and I have a gambling problem.

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EISENBERG: Charles, who do you relate to?

PAVLACK: I've been a comic book collector for about 40 years...

EISENBERG: Yeah.

PAVLACK: ...So I'd say Comic Book Guy, but my family's here, so I guess I should say Homer.

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EISENBERG: Ok, well, here is the reason we're talking about "The Simpsons." In this game, we're going to give you clues to famous people and fictional characters whose names end in the syllable oh (ph). And the catch is you have to answer like you are a frustrated Homer Simpson. Let's go to Jonathan Coulton for an example.

COULTON: So if I said Homer wouldn't cut off his ear like this artist, but it might fall off from all of the radiation of the power plant, your answer would be Vincent van Gogh.

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EISENBERG: And the contestant who is closest to Homer will move on to our Ask Me One More final round at the end of the show. Let's do this. Like Homer, this actor was the central figure in his own family sitcom where everybody loved him.

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EISENBERG: Charles.

PAVLACK: Ray Romano.

EISENBERG: There you go.

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EISENBERG: Homer probably hates it when Marge makes him watch "Grey's Anatomy," which recently marked the exit of this actress as Dr. Cristina Yang.

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EISENBERG: Charles.

PAVLACK: Sandra Oh.

EISENBERG: Yes, that was good.

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EISENBERG: Lisa's been trying to get Homer to read "Walden" by this philosopher, but instead, he continues to live his life of not-so-quiet desperation for donuts.

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EISENBERG: Charles.

PAVLACK: Thoreau.

EISENBERG: Thoreau, exactly. Henry David Thoreau.

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EISENBERG: Someone should open up, like, an artisanal donut shop called donuts. How come that hasn't happened?

COULTON: I don't know. We should do it.

EISENBERG: OK, yeah we'll do it - side project.

COULTON: Show's over everybody.

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EISENBERG: Homer was still telling Moe that Duff Beer was money long after he saw "Swingers" featuring this actor and "Iron Man" director.

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EISENBERG: Max.

LEINWAND: Jon Favreau.

EISENBERG: Yes.

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EISENBERG: All right, this is your last clue. Homer's mangled barbecue pit briefly made him an outsider artist - something he had in common with this wife of John Lennon.

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EISENBERG: Max.

LEINWAND: Yoko Ono.

EISENBERG: That is correct.

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EISENBERG: Let's go to our puzzle guru Greg Pliska and find out how did our contestants do?

GREG PLISKA, BYLINE: Well, congratulations, Charles. You're going to go on to the Ask Me One More final round at the end of the show.

(APPLAUSE) Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.