Lightning Fill In The Blank

Transcript

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now, onto our final game, Lightning Fill In The Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill-in-the-blank questions as he or she can, each correct answer now worth two points. Bill, can you give us the scores?

BILL KURTIS, BYLINE: Tom has four. Amy and Adam each have two.

SAGAL: OK. We have flipped a coin. Amy has elected to go second. Adam, you're up first. The clock will start when I begin your first question. Fill in the blank. On Wednesday, Senator Barbara Mikulski became the final vote needed to save the blank deal.

ADAM FELBER: Iran.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Thursday, Donald Trump signed the blank loyalty pledge.

FELBER: Republican.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Responding to protests from students and professors, officials at the University of Texas removed the college's statue of blank.

FELBER: Jeff Davis.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Wednesday, streaming service Hulu announced they would start offering a blank free subscription plan.

FELBER: Commercial.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Canadian police announced this week that they are still looking for a man who allegedly stole a pair of shoes from blank.

FELBER: Brian Adams.

SAGAL: No.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: He stole a pair of shoes from a man hanging his feet out of the window of his car at a McDonald's drive-thru.

This week, six NASA recruits begin a year-long project to simulate a mission to blank.

FELBER: Mars.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: During his acceptance speech, at the VMA awards on Sunday, blank announced he was going to run for president.

FELBER: Kanye, President Kanye West.

SAGAL: Kanye West.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: After he woke up to find his gold medal missing, the winner of the hammer throw at last week's track and field championships discovered he had blanked.

FELBER: Eaten eat...

SAGAL: No.

FELBER: ...In his sleep.

SAGAL: He had gone out to celebrate his win the night before, gotten really drunk, and paid for his taxi ride with the gold medal.

AMY DICKINSON: No.

SAGAL: It happens.

FELBER: That'll happen.

SAGAL: Pawel Fajdek won the gold in hammer throw and after a night of celebrating, he woke up with no idea where his medal had gone. As it turns out, he was short on cash on his way back to the hotel, so he used the medal to pay his cab fare. Fajdek may be down one gold medal, but look on the bright side. If he had won bronze, he would've had to take an UberX.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, how did Adam do on our quiz?

KURTIS: Adam got six. That means he has 12 more points and the lead with a total of 14 points.

DICKINSON: Oh, boy. Oh, boy.

SAGAL: All right. Amy, as you chose, you are now going to go second. Please, fill in the blank. On Thursday, Kentucky county clerk Kim Davis was jailed for refusing to issue blanks.

DICKINSON: Marriage licenses.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Amid a continuing corruption scandal, the president of blank resigned on Wednesday.

DICKINSON: Guatemala.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Last Saturday, residents of New Orleans gathered to commemorate the 10th anniversary of blank.

DICKINSON: Hurricane Katrina.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Blue Bell Ice Cream announced that its product will be returning to stores this week, four months after an outbreak of blank led to a recall.

DICKINSON: Listeria.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: In his U.S. Open loss to Andy Murray on Tuesday, Nick Kyrgious set a professional tennis record by blanking four times in one match.

DICKINSON: Acing.

SAGAL: No. He took a nap four times. For the first time in his career, Cubs pitcher Jake Arrieta blanked on Sunday.

DICKINSON: No-hitter.

SAGAL: Right, threw a no-hitter.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A teacher in New Jersey who was suspended for regular tardiness said he could not help being late because he blanks.

DICKINSON: He was high.

SAGAL: No - because he just loves breakfast too much.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Elementary school teacher Arnold Anderson was late for class 111 times over the last two years, leaving the school to suspend him. However, this week, an arbitrator let Anderson keep his job after he admitted that his constant tardiness was due to the fact that he is addicted to breakfast.

(LAUGHTER)

DICKINSON: I wonder if he uses - what's going to happen to that guy when he gets a hold of the pope toaster?

SAGAL: Oh, yeah.

DICKINSON: Whoa.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: Bill, how did Amy do on our quiz?

KURTIS: She got five more points. That gives her 10 with a total of 12.

SAGAL: All right.

KURTIS: And Adam still has the lead.

SAGAL: OK. So how many, then, does Tom need to win?

KURTIS: Five to tie and six to win.

SAGAL: All right. Tom, you ready to do this?

TOM BODETT: I am.

SAGAL: That's not too much. You can do this. On Sunday, the Obama administration proposed economic sanctions on blank in retaliation for that country's cyber espionage.

BODETT: China.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: According to the most recent Iowa poll, blank is now trailing Hillary by only seven points.

BODETT: Bernie Sanders.

SAGAL: Indeed.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: According to Tajikistan's state news agency, there's a new planet in the solar system called blank.

BODETT: Was it cuttlefish?

SAGAL: No, it was called Planet Tajikistan. Best known for his films "A Nightmare On Elm Street" and "Scream," director blank passed away this week at the age of 76.

BODETT: And as soon as you said that the name of this damn guy flew right of my head. This is terrible. This is embarrassing. I quit. I'm done with this and - it's Wes Craven.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL, APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: A man in Illinois who had just interviewed for a new job immediately lost it when he followed up for the interview by blanking.

BODETT: Now, this I know, and this is embarrassing. He sent naked pictures to the HR director - the interviewer.

SAGAL: That's what he did.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

DICKINSON: That didn't work? Wow.

SAGAL: Taking a page from the popular self-help book, "7 Habits Of Highly Unemployable People," the thankfully anonymous man - you know, 'cause you're supposed to follow up in an interview - they all say that. Send a note - thanks for the interview, looking forward to hearing from you. He sent two naked selfies to the HR department manager.

DICKINSON: But wait, did he do it on purpose?

SAGAL: Well, he says no. He says he meant - you know, her number was in his phone because they had talked. He meant to send them to somebody else. He said it was just all an average-sized misunderstanding.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, did Tom do well enough to win?

KURTIS: Well, Tom didn't do that bad. He got four right, eight more points, 12. But that means our champion this week is Adam Felber.

FELBER: Thank you, thank you.

(APPLAUSE)

FELBER: Thank you. Thank you so much. Thank you, Kentucky. Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.