Lightning Fill In The Blank

Transcript

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now, on to our final game, Lightning Fill In The Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill-in-the-blank questions as he or she can. Each correct answer is now worth two points. Bill, can you give us the scores?

BILL KURTIS, BYLINE: Peter has two. Amy and Adam each have three.

SAGAL: All right, well, Peter...

PETER GROSZ: Seems low for me.

AMY DICKINSON: It does seem low.

(LAUGHTER)

GROSZ: Let's do it.

SAGAL: All right, Peter, you are up first...

GROSZ: Wonderful.

SAGAL: ...As you are in third place. The clock will start when I begin your first question. Fill in the blank. Following a two-day policy meeting, the Federal Reserve announced on Thursday that they would not raise blank.

GROSZ: The interest rates.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, firefighters continued to battle a massive wildfire that's destroyed over a thousand homes in blank.

GROSZ: California.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: NBC announced this week that blank would replace Donald Trump as the host of "Celebrity Apprentice."

GROSZ: Oh, what's his name? Oh, yeah, yeah, the other joker, Arnold Schwarzenegger.

SAGAL: Right, Arnold Schwarzenegger.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A man in San Antonio is being held at a local prison after being caught blanking by a grocery store security camera.

GROSZ: Doing something with the vegetables.

SAGAL: No, shoving...

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Shoving $100 worth of steaks down his pants. And, yes, he is a repeat offender. This week, former 76er and NBA Hall-of-Famer blank passed away at the age of 60.

GROSZ: Moses Malone.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: In a new memoir, the former director of the Nobel Institute says that he regrets awarding blank the Nobel Peace Prize.

GROSZ: Barrack Obama?

SAGAL: Indeed.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Last week, the mayor of Jackson, Miss., announced his solution to the city's pothole problem was blank.

GROSZ: More potholes.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: No, his solution to the city's pothole problem, he thought, was prayer. Mayor Tony Yarber of Jackson, Miss., had run out of options to fix the city's crumbling infrastructure. So he tweeted out, yes, I believe we can pray the potholes away.

ADAM BURKE: I like the more pothole solution 'cause if you just lower the rest of the streets...

GROSZ: Yeah, everything - bring that down to the...

BURKE: Right.

DICKINSON: Down.

GROSZ: ...The level of the hole - bottom of the hole.

SAGAL: If you eliminate all the space that's not a pothole...

BURKE: Right.

GROSZ: Yeah.

SAGAL: ...Pretty soon everything's even again.

GROSZ: Yeah, it's just like negative space, positive space type of thing.

SAGAL: Bill, how did Peter do on our quiz?

KURTIS: Peter got five right, 10 more points. He now has 12 and the lead.

SAGAL: All right.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: Now, Adam and Amy are tied. But as our new panelist, I'm just going to give Adam the choice, as a courtesy, to decide whether you want to go second or third.

BURKE: Ladies first.

SAGAL: All right, Adam...

GROSZ: That sounds like a gentleman who should wear a cape.

(LAUGHTER)

BURKE: I'm having it tailored.

SAGAL: Adam has graciously allowed Amy to go first. So, Amy, over one million people were forced from their homes on Wednesday as an 8.3 magnitude earthquake struck blank.

DICKINSON: Chile.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Thursday, Senate Republicans failed to pass their final attempt to derail blank.

DICKINSON: The Iran nuclear deal?

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Intelligence analysts reported this week that senior military officers willfully exaggerated the U.S.'s progress in the war against blank.

DICKINSON: ISIS.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Thursday, the president and prime minister of blank were overthrown in a military coup.

DICKINSON: Burkina Faso?

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A woman who was arrested for driving drunk and against traffic in the Holland Tunnel provided a perfectly good explanation by saying blank.

DICKINSON: I was drunk.

SAGAL: No, she said that she did not want to go to New Jersey.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: This week, Apple announced the new blank had already broken pre-sale records.

DICKINSON: The new iPhone.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Sunday, Novak Djokovic defeated Roger Federer to win his second blank title.

DICKINSON: U.S. Open.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Canadian police who heard a woman calling for help over an apartment intercom broke down the door and found blank.

DICKINSON: Oh, OK, she - it was a cape malfunction.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: No, when the police broke down the wall, they found that the woman calling for help was actually a parrot named Gobbler calling for help.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: After hearing cries for help coming from an apartment intercom, a man in Ontario called the police, who broke down the door to the apartment and discovered a talking bird.

DICKINSON: But wait, the - so...

GROSZ: And then the firefighter came and the bird's like, ha ha, made you do it.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, how did Amy do on our quiz?

KURTIS: Amy got six right, 12 more points, 15 and the lead.

SAGAL: All right, now, if Adam, here...

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: If Adam, here, won this thing on his debut, it would be impressive. How many does he need to do that?

KURTIS: Six to tie and seven to win.

SAGAL: All right, Adam.

KURTIS: Can he do it? Can he do it?

SAGAL: We'll find out because, Adam, this is for the game. On Tuesday, Hungary closed off the main land route into Europe being used by the refugees from blank.

BURKE: Syria.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Thursday, no one in a South Carolina neighborhood was around to stop a home robbery 'cause they were all at a blank.

BURKE: Barbecue.

SAGAL: No, at a neighborhood watch meeting.

(LAUGHTER)

DICKINSON: No.

SAGAL: On Sunday, Georgia's Betty Cantrell was crowned the new blank.

BURKE: Head of the Betty Cantrell fan association.

SAGAL: No, the new Miss America. This week, Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos announced that his company, Blue Origin, would begin launching private blanks from Cape Canaveral.

BURKE: Space rockets.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A Norwegian man who was fed up with a dispute about his neighbor's house sticking over into his land just went ahead and blanked.

BURKE: Moved to Finland.

SAGAL: No, he sawed off the half of the house that was on his property. Some would say that the moral of the story is that good fences make good neighbors, but we think the moral is if you're sitting next to Arne Vigeland on a plane, do not hog the armrest.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, did Adam do well enough to win?

KURTIS: Well, for a newbie, he got two right, four more points, total is seven. That means Amy is the winner this week.

SAGAL: Well done.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: Done like a boss, Amy. Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.