Lightning Fill In The Blank

Transcript

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now it's time to move on to our final game, Lightning Fill in the Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill-in-the-blank questions as they can. Each correct answer now worth two points. Bill, can you give us the scores?

BILL KURTIS, HOST:

Tom and Luke each have three. Iliza has two.

SAGAL: All right. Iliza, you're in third place. You're up first. The clock will start when I begin your first question. Fill in the blank.

ILIZA SCHLESINGER: OK.

SAGAL: One month after he resigned from office, Alex Tsipras was re-elected prime minister of blank.

SCHLESINGER: Greece.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A 24-year-old British man, arrested after a high-speed chase with police, admitted that he blanked.

SCHLESINGER: Messed up?

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: That he learned to drive on his PlayStation. On Sunday, Viola Davis became the first black woman to win a blank for best actress in a drama series.

SCHLESINGER: Emmy.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Police in Moscow chased a man down several city streets before realizing the man was blanking.

SCHLESINGER: Sleeping still.

SAGAL: No.

SCHLESINGER: No, right before realizing the man was walking.

SAGAL: No, he was finishing the 10K race.

SCHLESINGER: Finishing the 10K race in Moscow...

SAGAL: Yes.

SCHLESINGER: ...That they do every year.

SAGAL: Yes.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Now, let me explain. The Russian world championship runner Rinas Akhmadeev was only 500 meters away from winning the 10K...

SCHLESINGER: Yep.

SAGAL: ...When he was chased down by police...

SCHLESINGER: By police.

SAGAL: ...And briefly detained. He would have been held even longer had the officer who stopped him not been called away to ticket an entire NASCAR event for speeding.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, how did Iliza do on our quiz?

KURTIS: Well, Iliza got two right.

SCHLESINGER: Thank you.

KURTIS: And you have a total of six now. But you're in the lead.

SCHLESINGER: All right.

(APPLAUSE)

SCHLESINGER: Thank you.

SAGAL: We have flipped a coin. Tom's elected to go last. So, Luke, you're up next. Fill in the blank. This week, Senate Republicans proposed a bill to avoid a potential blank.

LUKE BURBANK: Shutdown.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Last Friday, President Obama nominated the U.S.'s first openly blank secretary of the Army.

BURBANK: Gay.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, the head of the Peanut Corporation of America was sentenced to 28 years for knowingly shipping peanuts tainted with blank.

BURBANK: Salmonella.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, Turing Pharmaceuticals CEO Martin Shkreli became public enemy No.1 by buying the patent for a 62-year-old drug and then blanking.

BURBANK: Raising it by many, many, many times its original price.

SAGAL: Yes 5,000 percent.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

BURBANK: An Oklahoma man who went out drinking to celebrate his birthday did not realize until he got home that he had blank.

BURBANK: Celebrated too hard.

SAGAL: No, that he had been shot two times.

(LAUGHTER)

SCHLESINGER: It was close.

BURBANK: Well...

SAGAL: This week, researchers reported on Monday that 87 of 91 NFL players tested had positive results for a brain disease linked to what.

BURBANK: Concussions.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This Sunday, a 78-year-old Costco shopper was punched in the face because he was blanking.

BURBANK: Shooting off a gun at the other guy's birthday.

SAGAL: No, he was punched in the face 'cause apparently he was blocking another customer from getting to the Nutella samples.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: In what should be a cautionary tale for anyone who thinks that Nutella is a healthy snack option. A 78-year-old grandfather who was shopping at Costco on Sunday was punched in the face by a 23-year-old because he was blocking the young man from getting to the store's free samples.

BURBANK: There's not a jury in the country that'll convict that guy.

SAGAL: I know.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, how did Luke do on our quiz?

KURTIS: Luke got five right, 10 more points, total of 13. And, Iliza, I'm sorry, but Luke takes the lead.

SCHLESINGER: OK, I knew that. I did that math, thank you.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: All right then, Bill, how many does Tom need to win?

KURTIS: Five to tie and six to win.

SAGAL: All right, here you go, Tom. This is for the game. On Thursday, President Obama held a summit meeting with the president of blank.

TOM BODETT: China.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Presidential hopeful Ben Carson came under fire this week after he said that no blank should ever be president.

BODETT: Muslim.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: After over three years of negotiation, the president of blank announced a breakthrough in peace talks with rebel leaders.

BODETT: Oh, Colombia.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Donald Trump announced Wednesday that he was boycotting cable news outlet blank for, quote, "treating me so unfairly."

BODETT: Fox.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A man in Pennsylvania has been sentenced for up to 124 years for armed robbery after the jury rejected his claim that blank.

BODETT: He was just making a friendly withdrawal.

SAGAL: No, they rejected his claim that the robberies were actually committed by his evil twin.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: A federal judge in Los Angeles ruled that all copyright claims against the song blank are invalid.

BODETT: Oh, "Happy Birthday."

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A fan at last Saturday's Blue Jays-Red Sox game had too much to drink and blanked.

BODETT: He tackled their mascot moose.

SAGAL: No, he fell asleep while standing at a urinal, pulled the urinal off the wall and flooded a section of the stadium.

BODETT: Now, Luke, am I right? How many times has that happened?

BURBANK: I mean, this season?

SAGAL: Yeah.

BURBANK: For me?

SAGAL: So apparently the Blue Jays fan got up to use the bathroom during the sixth inning, proceeded to pass out at the urinal, and as he fell, he ripped it off the wall. And while this did, in turn, cause a massive flood that necessitated the evacuation of a section of the stadium, we can agree the worst part is somebody actually touched a baseball stadium urinal.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, did Tom Bodett do well enough to win?

KURTIS: Well, he did well - Five right, 10 more points, 13, but that means Tom and Luke are tied for the lead and championship.

SAGAL: Oh, well.

(APPLAUSE) Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.