Lightning Fill In The Blank

Transcript

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now on to our final game, Lightning Fill In The Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill-in-the-blank questions as he or she can. Each correct answer now worth two points. Bill, can you give us the scores?

BILL KURTIS, BYLINE: I sure can. Paula and P.J. each have two, Amy has four.

AMY DICKINSON: What?

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: We've flipped a coin. P.J. has elected to go first. The clock will start when I been your first question. Fill in the blank. This week, a surprise storm broke records when it left parts of blank buried under 6 feet of snow.

O'ROURKE: Buffalo.

SAGAL: Yes, Buffalo.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Following more allegations of misconduct, both Netflix and NBC cut ties with comedian...

O'ROURKE: Bill Cosby.

SAGAL: Bill Cosby, yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Tuesday, Republican senators blocked a bill that would've stopped the NSA from collecting Americans' blank records.

O'ROURKE: Internet records.

SAGAL: No, in this case, cell phone records.

O'ROURKE: Oh, cell phone.

SAGAL: Police in England arrested a man for threatening workers at a local supermarket with a blank.

O'ROURKE: Oh, it was that bubblegum flavored broccoli.

SAGAL: No, it was a photocopied picture of a gun.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: An Illinois police officer is under investigation after pulling over a school bus in order to blank.

O'ROURKE: Do what Lady Gaga did.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: No. He pulled over a school bus in order to give his son the lunch that the kid forgot at home.

DICKINSON: Awe. Now that's a good dad.

PAULA POUNDSTONE: Not really.

SAGAL: So the bus is driving along. All of a sudden, the unmarked car behind it, the lights go on. The bus driver pulls over, doesn't know what's going on. Police officer walks up, walks onto the bus stares at him and says, Jimmy, here's your lunch, you forgot it, walks off, which I think is a pretty cool dad thing to do. But unfortunately for the police officer, the bus driver filed a complaints, and the disciplinary board at the Lake County precinct may be left with no choice but to ask Officer Keller to turn in his gun, his badge and his been a butter and jelly.

DICKINSON: Awe. It's like a good dad, bad cop story.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, how did P.J. do on our quiz?

KURTIS: Well, he got two points.

O'ROURKE: Two points.

KURTIS: Well, you get four. But right now, you're in the lead with six.

SAGAL: We'll pause and let you enjoy that. All right, now it's Paula's turn. Paula, you're up next. Please fill in the blank. Three students were injured on Thursday when a gunman opened fire at blank University.

POUNDSTONE: FSU.

SAGAL: Yes, Florida State University.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, President Obama ordered a review of U.S. policies on how to free American hostages held by blank.

POUNDSTONE: Is is.

SAGAL: Is is, ISIS, yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: The State Department announced on Monday that they were the most recent federal agency to be targeted by blank.

POUNDSTONE: Hackers.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: According to the Mars candy company, the world is on the brink of a major blank shortage.

POUNDSTONE: No.

(LAUGHTER)

POUNDSTONE: Chocolate.

SAGAL: Yes, Paula.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Jacksonville Jaguars cornerback Dwayne Gratz was arrested for public intoxication when he tried to blank at a convenience store.

POUNDSTONE: Chocolate.

SAGAL: No.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: She's not going to say another word. He tried to pay for his goods with a pack of bubblegum. Best known for playing Thor in "The Avengers," Australian actor Chris Hemsworth was named People magazine's blank.

POUNDSTONE: Sexiest man of the year.

SAGAL: Yes indeed.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, Jason Collins, the first openly gay player in the blank announced his retirement.

POUNDSTONE: In the - Jason Collins...

O'ROURKE: (Whispering) Bounce, bounce, bounce, bounce.

POUNDSTONE: ...In basketball.

SAGAL: In the NBA.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Officials in Arizona...

POUNDSTONE: I cheated.

SAGAL: ...Were forced to evacuate a Taco Bell...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

SAGAL: ...After a man blanked.

(LAUGHTER)

POUNDSTONE: He ate a taco.

SAGAL: No, he walked in while on fire and asked for a glass of water. The man, who witnesses say was only completely new engulfed in flames, calmed walked into the Taco Bell, approached the counter and asked the cashier for a glass of water. The cashier gave him more than that, brought out a fire extinguisher and put out the man's fire. The occasion marks the first time in history that someone has left a Taco Bell feeling better than when they walked in.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: All right, Bill.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: So, Bill, how did Paula do on our quiz?

KURTIS: Well, she got six right, 12 more points. She now has 14 and the lead, Paula.

DICKINSON: Whoa.

POUNDSTONE: You know, I do feel that P.J. gave me a very - a hint. And I feel that that point should be given to P.J. And I should be down to - what would that be - 10 points?

DICKINSON: Oh, no.

O'ROURKE: Amy Dickinson is going to so whip our butt.

(LAUGHTER)

DICKINSON: That's really...

POUNDSTONE: In which case, I want my points back.

SAGAL: Let's see how it plays out. OK, Bill, how many does Amy need to win?

KURTIS: Well, she needs five to tie and six to win.

SAGAL: Here we go, Amy. This is for the game. After it passed in the House last week, the Senate fell one vote shy of approving the blank.

DICKINSON: Keystone Pipeline.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Missouri Governor Jay Nixon declared a state of emergency in preparation for the grand jury's decision in blank.

DICKINSON: Ferguson.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Wednesday, Montana became the most recent state to have it's blank ban overturned.

DICKINSON: Gay marriage.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: John Kerry met with negotiators in France before heading to Vienna to continue the talks about Iran's blank program.

DICKINSON: Nuclear.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Buffalo Bills fans were told they could have free tickets to this Sunday's game if they blanked.

DICKINSON: Shoveled out the stadium.

SAGAL: Exactly. From all the snow.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Pope Francis confirmed Monday that he'd be making his first papal visit to blank in 2015.

DICKINSON: America.

SAGAL: Yes, the U.S.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, 100 passengers in Japan shared a ride on the country's new high-speed blank, which can travel up to 300 miles per hour.

DICKINSON: Train.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A celebrity poker match featuring...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

SAGAL: ...Ex-baseball star Jose Canseco was briefly interrupted when blank.

DICKINSON: He corked his cards.

SAGAL: No. The match was briefly interrupted when Jose Canseco's finger fell off. So a few weeks ago, Jose Canseco shot his finger off while cleaning his gun. It happens.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: And he naturally had his finger reattached. But apparently he went to a cut-rate surgeon because it didn't quite take. And this week, Canseco was playing a game of Texas Can't- Quite-Hold'em.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: And his recently repaired finger fell off. Bill, did Amy do well enough to win?

KURTIS: Pretty well. Seven right, 14 more points, 18 and that spells champion.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: Now, in just a minute, after we've reviewed the return of "Do They Know It's Christmas?" we're going to ask our panelists to name the next big fundraising song that we will hear. Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.