This, That Or The Other VIII

Transcript

OPHIRA EISENBERG, HOST:

Say hello to our next contestants, Rosemarie Wallace and Maryann Aita.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: Maryanne, the first go-round you got a little rattled by the buzzers. You didn't like them. What is your goal - your personal goal - this time around?

MARYANN AITA: I'd like to be the third co-host of ASK ME ANOTHER.

JONATHAN COULTON, BYLINE: Jeez, stakes are high.

AITA: No, actually I just, I'm...

EISENBERG: I know, that's intense. I like it.

AITA: Or losing again, so I can come back a third time.

EISENBERG: Yes, OK, I like that. Now Rosemarie, last time you were on the show, this happened...

(SOUNDBITE OF ARCHIVED BROADCAST)

COULTON: (Singing) You got two opposable thumbs. You like bananas, you want to groom me, don't try to hug me.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

ROSEMARIE WALLACE: (Singing) Was it a monkey?

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: Singing in front of people was on your bucket list.

WALLACE: Indeed it was.

EISENBERG: And we achieved that. What's on your bucket list this time around?

WALLACE: Well, I found out that people don't recognize you when you walk down the street because it's radio.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: Sure.

WALLACE: And then I also thought people can't see what you do. So at 50...

EISENBERG: Oh.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: Rosemarie on our stage said not every 50-year-old can do this, and then just went right down into the full amazing splits like a ballerina.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: You're in for a treat because we're going to play an ASK ME ANOTHER classic and this is just season three. We already have a classic. It's a game called "This, That Or The Other." We'll give you a name, and all you have to do is tell us which of three categories it belongs to. Jonathan Coulton, what are our categories today?

COULTON: Today's categories are indie bands, foreign films and "Dungeons & Dragons" monsters.

(APPLAUSE)

COULTON: Ready?

WALLACE: As ready as one can be.

COULTON: All right, Maryann, this is for you - "Whale Rider."

AITA: Indie film.

COULTON: Again, the categories are indie bands...

AITA: Band. Oh...

COULTON: ...Foreign films or "D & D monster."

(LAUGHTER)

COULTON: I'm going to give you a chance to change your answer, or be more specific with your answer.

EISENBERG: To be fair, a lot of foreign films could be considered indie films.

COULTON: This is true. It's true. It's true. And a lot of indie bands are foreign, that's true. Both true, I just want clarity at the start, that's all.

AITA: It's a film - so foreign film.

COULTON: Foreign film is correct.

(APPLAUSE)

COULTON: Rosemarie, sparkle horse.

(LAUGHTER)

WALLACE: "D & D."

COULTON: No, I'm sorry. It's an indie band.

AITA: It should be "D & D."

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: A sparkle horse in "D & D"?

COULTON: It would be a terrifying monster though. The horse who was very sparkly.

EISENBERG: Just sparkly.

COULTON: Ah, my eyes.

EISENBERG: My eyes. Everyone put on your sunglasses.

COULTON: Maryann, Ooze Mephit?

AITA: "D & D?"

COULTON: Yes, it is a monster.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: Maryann, can you tell me how you knew that?

AITA: No.

(LAUGHTER)

COULTON: It's a secret. Rosemarie, Shambling Mound.

WALLACE: "D & D."

COULTON: Obviously, "D & D" monster.

(APPLAUSE)

WALLACE: I knew Dunkin Donuts would show up once.

COULTON: Dunkin' Donuts monster, that's right.

EISENBERG: That does sound like a very strange donut.

COULTON: Yeah, shambling mount.

EISENBERG: Shambling mount.

GREG PLISKA: I'll have a latte and a shambling mound.

(LAUGHTER)

COULTON: The thing is one shambling mound is not enough and two is too much. Maryann, Imagine Dragons.

AITA: Indie band.

COULTON: Yeah, it sounds like you know them.

AITA: I do.

COULTON: They won a Grammy, so you should. Rosemarie, the "Spirit Of The Beehive."

WALLACE: Lives in me.

(LAUGHTER)

COULTON: And in all of us, indeed.

WALLACE: I'm going to go with foreign film.

COULTON: That's right. It's a foreign film.

(APPLAUSE)

COULTON: A Spanish film.

EISENBERG: That's a terrible "D & D" monster too.

COULTON: It's not an actual beehive, it's just the idea of a beehive. This is your last of questions. Maryann, black pudding.

(LAUGHTER)

AITA: Foreign film.

COULTON: No, I'm sorry.

(LAUGHTER)

COULTON: I'm sorry, it is a "D & D" monster.

(APPLAUSE)

COULTON: All three possibilities seem very unlikely.

EISENBERG: I do like that as a foreign film of just people eating that sausage.

COULTON: It's a documentary.

COULTON: Rosemarie, brain in a jar.

WALLACE: I'm going to go with indie band.

COULTON: No, I'm sorry. It's a "D & D" monster.

(APPLAUSE)

COULTON: Easily defeated. I cast the spell of kicking over jars.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: You've just got to twist that cap on, no one can open it up.

COULTON: No one could open it up.

EISENBERG: You'd have to get a rubber glove monster.

COULTON: Greg Pliska, what the hell happened in that game?

(LAUGHTER)

PLISKA: Dunkin' Donuts got a great plug in that game. I'd like a black pudding and a brain in the jar please.

COULTON: Maryann, you are our winner. And we'll see you again at the Ask Me One More Final Round at the end of the show.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: Coming up, we'll talk to our VIP John Cameron Mitchell, and we'll continue to see how our former contestants do with their do-over. Remember, if you live life without any regrets, you're doing it wrong. So stick around, I'm Ophira Eisenberg and this is NPR's ASK ME ANOTHER.

(APPLAUSE) Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.