The World Makes Money Go Round

Transcript

OPHIRA EISENBERG, HOST:

This game is called World Makes the Money Go Around. Say hello to our contestants, Erin Ratz and Ian Hoffman.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: Both of them have very cool jobs. High school chemistry teacher, Aaron, what is, what is...

UNIDENTIFIED WOMAN: Yeah.

EISENBERG: ...Yeah, that's awesome. What is the biggest crowd-pleasing experiment that you can offer the high school kids?

ERIN RATZ: Well, basically anything with fire. But recently, we generated some hydrogen gas and exploded it in small quantities, of course.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: Ian is visiting from D.C. You work for the Department of Justice.

IAN HOFFMAN: That's right.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: What do you do at the Department of Justice?

HOFFMAN: I work for the antitrust division and so...

(CHEERING)

EISENBERG: A lot of antitrust fans.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: I don't know what that means.

(LAUGHTER)

HOFFMAN: So people who are supposed to be competitors sometimes don't do that. They get together and fix prices or rig bids.

EISENBERG: Yeah.

HOFFMAN: So then they call us in, we prosecute them and then occasionally, send them to jail.

EISENBERG: Yeah, sounds fun.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: Everyone likes that. You're basically, like, the shame-on-you people.

HOFFMAN: Yeah.

JOHN FLANSBURGH, BYLINE: You're doing God's work.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: John.

FLANSBURGH: Doctora (ph).

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: John, you do love traveling, right?

FLANSBURGH: I do an incredible amount of traveling. I was going to use a swear word, but...

EISENBERG: You decided against it?

FLANSBURGH: ...We're on the radio.

EISENBERG: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. What is the weirdest kind of coin that you have in your drawer?

FLANSBURGH: I've got a ton of coins. They're not that weird. You know, through the miracle of imperialism, there's a lot of redundancy. I mean, I was just in Tasmania and I just...

EISENBERG: I always use that phrase, the miracle of imperialism.

(LAUGHTER)

FLANSBURGH: Yeah. I was in Tasmania, and they just have, like, Australian coins. But the most interesting coins I have actually are - I have a bunch of New York transit coins from the '70s that have the Y in them.

EISENBERG: Oh, yeah. Yeah.

(APPLAUSE)

FLANSBURGH: And those are really, like, the only really fun ones I got.

EISENBERG: Very cool. Those are very cool.

FLANSBURGH: Yeah.

EISENBERG: You want to let the contestants know what kind of game they get?

FLANSBURGH: Contestants, do you know the world's currencies? Probably not.

(LAUGHTER)

FLANSBURGH: We're going to give you some helpful homonyms. You identify the currency. If I said the currency of the United Kingdom buys you a dog kennel, you might say pound. But you might stand there.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: So ring in when you know...

FLANSBURGH: Wonder...

EISENBERG: ...The world currency.

FLANSBURGH: Wonder - yes.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: Here we go.

FLANSBURGH: The miracle of imperialism, ladies and gentlemen.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: It's a Swiss currency that buys you exactly one hot dog.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Ian.

HOFFMAN: A franc.

EISENBERG: A frank. Yeah, perfect.

(APPLAUSE)

FLANSBURGH: Well played. The currency of Bosnia...

(LAUGHTER)

FLANSBURGH: We've got plenty of time.

(LAUGHTER)

FLANSBURGH: I'll repeat the question.

(LAUGHTER)

FLANSBURGH: The currency of Bosnia and the pre-Euro currency of Germany, this could buy you one Cuban, one Roscoe - normally quite expensive - or one Wahlberg.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

FLANSBURGH: Ian.

HOFFMAN: A mark.

FLANSBURGH: That is correct. Ophira, tell us about Angola, Ophira.

EISENBERG: In Angola, it's often used in gifts for a well-known African-American and pan-African holiday.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Ian.

HOFFMAN: Kwanzaa.

EISENBERG: Kwanzaa, yes.

(APPLAUSE)

FLANSBURGH: That is correct. In Thailand, you can spend one of these to get an automated computer program, like one that indexes the web for a search engine.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

FLANSBURGH: Ian.

HOFFMAN: A baht.

FLANSBURGH: Baht is the answer.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: I kind of wish that they were robots. It'd be cool. The future.

FLANSBURGH: Do they have bots, like, on the currency?

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: A $100 bill's a transformer.

FLANSBURGH: Yeah.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: This Ethiopian currency makes you shiver with cold when you hold it. It's the sound your lips make when you're freezing. Is this European currency...

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Erin.

FLANSBURGH: Erin.

RATZ: Birr?

EISENBERG: Birr is correct.

FLANSBURGH: Correct.

(APPLAUSE)

FLANSBURGH: A piece of South African money, it bears the image of a U.S. senator from Kentucky with the last name Paul.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

FLANSBURGH: Ian.

HOFFMAN: A rand.

FLANSBURGH: Yes, correct.

EISENBERG: Correct.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: John Flansburgh, how did our contestants do?

FLANSBURGH: They did fantastically, Ophira. Do you have any other questions?

EISENBERG: Yes.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: Which one of them is going to be moving on to our final round?

FLANSBURGH: Ian is the winner, ladies and gentlemen.

(APPLAUSE)

FLANSBURGH: Thank you for playing the game, Erin. We will see you in the final round, Ian.

EISENBERG: Wow.

(LAUGHTER) Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.