Abby Wambach has won 2 gold medals. She says real success came later

A note from Wild Card host Rachel Martin: We've all got unexpected turns in our lives, right? But let's be honest, some people have more than most. And I am going to put Abby Wambach in that camp. Here's the short version of what went down.

She's this global U.S. soccer star with two Olympic gold medals and a World Cup championship. She also holds the U.S. goal scoring record for women and men. She's on top of the world. When she retires from soccer in 2015, life becomes disorienting. And it turns out she's been hiding a drinking problem, and roughly five months later she gets a DUI. Then comes rehab, and a personal reckoning.

She writes a book about all of it, then goes to an event to promote said book and ends up meeting the woman who would become her second wife, the author Glennon Doyle. Now she's the stepmom of three kids, a leadership coach, and the co-host of the hit podcast she does with Doyle called We Can Do Hard Things.

I mean, she's only 44 and Abby Wambach has lived at least three lives. And in her show, you hear all the stuff Wambach has learned in those lives.

And if for any reason you are feeling a little bit down, watch Wambach's winning goal against Brazil in the 2004 gold medal Olympics match (it's at 2:07:30 in the clip below). Just do it. You will feel happier. Trust me.

This Wild Card interview has been edited for length and clarity. Host Rachel Martin asks guests randomly-selected questions from a deck of cards. Tap play above to listen to the full podcast, or read an excerpt below.

Question 1: When you were bored as a kid, where would your imagination take you?

Abby Wambach: When I was growing up, there weren't any women athletes to watch on television. It was just basically, you know, Michael Jordan. And so I saw him win a lot of championships after scoring those last-second points. And so when I was bored, I would imagine a ball kind of coming in from the sideline into the box and I would imagine myself scoring the goal in the last second.

So when those moments started to actually happen, I had played through this moment so often in my head. And because of the imagining, I never stopped believing that we could have that one moment come to fruition. And people ask me all the time, "How did you score so many big goals in such important moments?" And there's a lot of reasons for it, but I think one of the first steps is believing and imagining that you can do it before you do it.

Rachel Martin: I mean, that's so powerful. Now, everybody talks about manifesting, right? Like, you just think it and then it can happen. But that's like a very clear example of doing that.

Wambach: Yeah. I mean, my wife, it drives her nuts because I'm such an optimist and sometimes that can steer me awry. But if you want something in your life, it's not just that you are ready for it, it's that this moment has already happened.

Question 2: Has your idea of success changed over time?

Wambach: I don't think it necessarily has changed. I think the context of my life has changed. It's a feeling of self-esteem that I think determined my success. My definition of success is, how do I feel about myself today?

Because I've had high levels of success. And I know for certain, when we watch the gold medal ceremonies at the Olympics, the athletes that are standing on that top podium are going to feel really good about themselves. But that moment is fleeting. You have to wake up tomorrow and also feel good about yourself.

Martin: Without all the fanfare.

Wambach: Yeah. And I think that having a gold medal is really cool. I think it's really cool. But let me tell you, a couple weeks away from the Olympics after getting a gold medal, I still have to look at myself in the mirror and say, "How do I feel about myself today? What did I do today to feel good?"

I can't rely on being an Olympic gold medal winner and having that be the thing that sustains me throughout my life. Because it doesn't work. Things that we do in the past will not justify how we feel in the present. And so I think that my idea of success hasn't changed, because I've always kind of held this belief, but I think my definition of what makes me feel good every day has changed throughout my life.

Question 3: Are you comfortable with being forgotten?

Wambach: I am. When I retired, Gatorade pitched me on a possible commercial shoot that they wanted to do for my retirement game. And as I was reading through the storyboards, I just started to weep because the idea of this commercial was, "Forget me." Because if I am forgotten, then I know that the game has grown and the game is better. If I am forgotten, then somebody else has taken my place. And that is the natural order of the world.

I believe that records are meant to be broken. I believe that growth, especially 10 years ago where we were with women's soccer, was required, was necessary, was not just possible, but inevitable. So I think that we all should live a life like that. I think we should all lay our cards out, leave it on the field, whatever you want to say. And then in the end, if you are forgotten, it means that you have done the right kind of work here to make the world a little bit better by having existed.

The funniest thing about this is I was coaching my kid's rec league team about five or six years ago. And we were warming up for the championship game. I was telling them about when I retired from playing soccer. And one of the players said, "Wait, you played soccer?" I said, "Yes." And she said, "Who did you play for?" And I said, "The United States of America." And she said, "Oh. Do you know Alex Morgan?" And I was like, sheesh, we need to be careful what we wish for, peeps. So yeah, forget me.