Important, But Not Easy: How To Open Up About Mental Health

Mental health can be tough to talk about. The stigma that's still attached to mental illness can cause someone who may need help to stay quiet.

But according to Wake Forest University counseling professor Seth Hayden, it doesn't have to be that way.

WFDD's Sean Bueter recently spoke to Dr. Hayden about what it means to open up about mental health issues, and strategies for helping loved ones cope.

Interview Highlights

On the cloud of stigma that still hangs over issues of mental health and illness:

We often talk about a lot of other things very openly, and I wish we would do that more in terms of mental health. I think we could just have mental health just be a regular conversation that people have and for them to understand that there's not something wrong with you if that's what's going on.

It's a thought of physical concerns and how it is that we tend not to have as much of a stigma around that. If you break your leg, you go to the doctor. And I guess I would like to see somewhat of a parallel with how we approach mental health: that it's not something wrong with you, it's that something is not working the way that it could be right now, and here are some resources for you to be able to deal with that.

Hayden's tips on approaching difficult mental health conversations: 

I don't know if it necessarily has to be family or friends to start off. I think that it could be someone that you trust; that is, you have a non-judgmental relationship with, to some degree, to where you feel as if you can really be open with them and they tend to be open with you, and maybe that's where you start. And that could be your family. It could be your friends. It could be other kinds of relationships. It could be working with someone who is a mental health professional such as a counselor.

One of the goals often that we have in my work with clients is developing a support system. So that we'll have that conversation of 'What is your support system? And then how do we feel about that? And then how can we expand your support system?' Because I think once people leave the work that I do with them as a counselor they're going to go out into the world and it's going to be useful for them to have people around them who are understanding of what they're going through and are there to support them.

On talking to loved ones who may have a mental health issue:

I think identifying what you're seeing but also doing it within the context of 'I care for you. And I have concern and this is why I have concerns.' So, not to indicate 'something is wrong with you.'

It's more along the lines of 'look I care about you and this is what I'm seeing. And let's talk about it and I want to be someone who you can talk to about these things.' And so I think it's approaching this subject with a very caring manner.

On how you can better identify the need to seek help yourself:

I would say that it doesn't necessarily have to be to the level of a mental illness. I would say that counseling can be beneficial for anybody who has a sticking point in their life that they would like to go to a person who's trained to talk with them about what's going on and to explore the aspects of their experience to see if there are ways in which they could get some support. And so I don't necessarily know if it has to be to the significant level that oftentimes people may feel it has to be to seek support.

I know oftentimes when we receive mental health support it's often the last thing someone does. And I understand that because it's not necessarily something someone initially wants to do. I think it is useful to engage in that a little earlier to where it maybe doesn't rise to that level and that you can have a supportive professional there to help you.